There are many stages of a relationship as a couple grows closer together. One of the most significant and potentially stressful stages is moving in with your partner – going into it unprepared is a recipe for disaster and can kill even the strongest relationship. Fortunately, there are a few signs that if you read them right, will tell you when to move in together.
10 Signs That You're Ready to Move in Together
So when do couples move in together? Keep reading to learn the signs that will show you that the time is right to share a home with your partner.
1. You are comfortable with sharing your personal space
Moving in with someone involves making a few sacrifices, the most obvious of which is your privacy. You and your partner will be sharing living space, meaning you will witness each other's most personal moments. You will have to get used to each other's habits and schedules, combining them and sometimes compromising when they clash. If you are comfortable with this, you might be ready to move in together, but if the thought makes you uneasy, hold off on making the leap until you know each other better.
2. You've successfully lived with roommates before
If this is the first time you have considered living with a romantic partner, you might be a little unsure if you really can adjust to sharing your space with them. If you've only ever lived alone or with your family, it could be a tough job indeed. If you've had roommates before, however, you will probably find the transition much easier. Even though a roommate situation is much less intimate than a relationship, you will have gained valuable practice in having a little less privacy, splitting bills and chores and resolving conflicts.
3. You are personally independent
A lot of people make the mistake of moving in with their partner out of a need to cure their loneliness or fill an inner void. This rarely works – the negative feelings remain, but now the person also has to deal with someone else and their quirks. It may seem a bit paradoxical, but one of the best signs that you are ready to move in together is being perfectly fulfilled on your own. That way, even if things go wrong in the relationship, you will be able to return to your previous state, without experiencing a lot of emotional turmoil.
4. You enjoy spending time together
It's pretty obvious that if you are going to be spending most of your home life with someone, the two of you had better have good chemistry. Some people try to use moving in together to create that chemistry, but that never really works. If you already have a lot of fun with each other, it will make adjusting to life together much more joyful. The additional time you spend together won't feel like a burden at all and there will be much less friction between you, giving your relationship a much greater chance of surviving the transition.
5. You already spend a lot of time at each other's places
It's usual for couples to spend nights at each other's houses from time to time. When this starts happening regularly, it makes sense to make the arrangement permanent. So when should you move in together? The answer is when it seems like you spend more time at each other's houses than alone on your own. It means that you've had plenty of time to get comfortable with each other and have already done half the work of adjusting to each other. To top it off, living apart at this point in your relationship would be a waste of money anyway, so the savings you'll make are an added bonus.
6. You share the same financial values and aren't just doing it for the money
Saving money should never be the primary reason you move in together, though. You and your partner don't necessarily need to be on the exact equal financial footing, but you both need to be financially independent and make contributions to your life together. This way, resentment won't build up over one of you doing all the financial heavy lifting. You should also have the same values over how you spend and save money. Lack of financial compatibility is a sure relationship killer, so make sure you have this conversation long before you actually make the move.
7. You solve fights and arguments easily
Over the course of a relationship, disagreements will inevitably occur. When you're living together, the added proximity means that more opportunities for disagreements to come up will arise. You will also have fewer opportunities to cool off apart from each other. To survive, you had better have the ability to solve those disagreements together. If you're already good at de-escalating fights, killing arguments and making compromises for each other, you will have a much easier time doing the same when you are living together.
8. You're planning a future together
Moving in together is not a small commitment. We've already mentioned a few of the difficulties you will face - having less privacy, figuring out how you'll handle the finances and arguments that pop up, as well as many other issues that can occur. If you don't see the relationship lasting long-term, then making all of those adjustments might not be worth it, especially if you're going to have to go through them again with another person later on. If you're making plans for a long-term future though, moving in together can be a great way to fully test out your compatibility and become used to a long life with each other.
9. You have matching style and decorative sense
People have many ways of expressing their individuality and shaping the world around them to suit their desires. The way we decorate our personal space is one of these expressions, and no two people's tastes in this department are exactly the same. It's possible for two people's tastes to be broadly similar, though, and this is usually the best situation when moving in together. Make sure to get to know your partner's decorative sense long before you think about moving in together, and have a discussion beforehand on how you will compromise and merge each other's styles.
10. The two of you have discussed it a lot
As you can see, there are many intricate considerations to make before moving in with your partner. The thing is, it's not just you who has to make them, your partner has to be on the same page as well. The only way to know, of course, is by talking to each other about it. If you've already had many conversations about moving in, that's great, but if the idea has just started to seem like a good one, make sure you talk as much as you can with your partner about every aspect mentioned in this list. That way you can make sure you're both ready.
Conclusion – Trust Your Intuition
We've gone through many practical considerations that you need to make before moving in with your partner, but you also must remember that a relationship is built primarily on mutual feelings. When everything else is in place, your feelings should be the ultimate guide that will reveal to you when to move in together. Trust in your heart, and enter this new adventure of love with your partner.