Breakups are difficult, and they take time to get over. Whether you've been in a marriage or in a relationship, it's just as difficult to move on with your life if you've been together for too long. Sadly, many people end up getting into a rebound relationship, which is a bad move no matter what.
Rebound relationships are relationships started soon after the breakup took place. You haven't healed from the pain that came with the last relationship, yet you're already trying to have a bond with someone else. However, these relationships don't last the majority of the time. It is mostly because you bring your emotional baggage from the last relationship, causing issues and pain in the new one. Conversely, the partner who freshly broke up with someone is usually trying to use the new person as a distraction, or use them to move on or prove to themselves that they're still able to date.
Are you wondering whether you're in a rebound relationship or in a real one? Here are some signs that give it away.
Your Partner Just Went Through a Breakup
Did your partner experience a breakup not long before they got with you? Well, then you may be a rebound for them. In general, when someone starts a new relationship shortly after ending the last one, they don't have time to move on. To be more specific, they don't spend enough time taking a break, letting go of the feelings, and thinking about what they want from the future.
What they do is instantly jump into a new relationship, thinking that this will somehow put an end to the pain they're feeling and make it easier to move on. Nobody is ready to move into a new relationship if their mind isn't clear, because they cannot give it their all, and they also risk hurting someone who loves them.
They Constantly Talk About Their Ex
Let's be fair, if someone says they're over someone, yet they keep talking about them, they are certainly not over it. Therefore, if your partner does this, you have all reasons to be upset. You're supposed to focus on creating something nice together, yet the past always seems to ruin everything because your partner constantly brings them up. In case your partner is not talking to their ex anymore yet they still make sure to bring them up often, they may still have feelings for the former love interest.
You're Constantly Being Compared to Their Ex
Although it may feel good to know that your partner considers you a blessing in their life, especially compared to their ex, it becomes frustrating at some point. If everything you say or do is being compared to how the ex used to do it, then maybe you're part of a rebound relationship. Constantly talking about their ex means they are not over it, which will be damaging to the bond you are trying to create.
Not to mention that it also keeps you from getting to know each other and creating something for yourself.
There's No Deep Communication
Even if you thought that this new relationship was going to be the best, you feel like there is no communication going between you and your partner. And through communication, we don't mean just casual talking, but actual deep conversations.
Does it feel like your partner isn't really telling you anything, and cannot express feelings or talk about more serious things with you? The chances are the relationship is a rebound one.
The Attachment Is More Physical Than Mental
There's nothing wrong with physical intimacy. If anything, it's an important aspect of any relationship. It's not the only one, though. If you have the physical but lack the emotional aspect, then you may be in a rebound.
Although there's nothing wrong with sexual relationships as long as both parties consent, it can be damaging to someone who wants a romantic bond.
You Don't Discuss a Potential Future Together
When you're in a new relationship, exploring life together and trying to write your own story should be the main concerns. However, if you feel like you cannot plan for the future together, maybe there's an issue. Your partner may feel unsure about the future of the relationship, maybe because they're still not over the last one or because they think they made the wrong decision ending it.
If you notice that your partner changes the subject or doesn't bring up the idea of being together in the future, it could be a red flag. It doesn't mean that you should already see yourself married and with babies from the first day, but at least the intention of having a long relationship should be there.
You Tend to Always Feel Anxious in the Relationship
Do you constantly feel anxious in the relationship? It could be because your partner is giving some red flags that they are either not over their last relationship, or that they don't want a long-lasting experience with you. Whichever the reason is, it makes you feel anxious, like you could lose your loved one at any time. Even if everything looks great from the outside, you're actually dying inside.
Make sure these feelings are valid and don't come from your own trauma. If they are justified, you may be in a rebound relationship.
Final Thoughts
Being a rebound can be painful and could lead to heartbreak if you end up catching feelings for the other person. You may be wondering how long rebound relationships last, and usually, they last around 3 months, although they can go for longer. If your relationship ended after a similar amount of time and your partner used to be with someone else not long before you got together, it was probably a rebound. When you meet someone new and you have a romantic interest in them, watch out for the signs presented in the article and save yourself the heartbreak.